Why Yoruichi Avoids Pet Stores
by Itaneko-chan
Summary: "Now, Yoruichi-san, let's go for a day out!" Why is it...that she actually agreed to go with him? And...is that catnip? A repost from another account I had- Pastaneko-chan.
1. Chapter 1

(A/N: This is an UraYoru fanfic and it's based on what happened when I gave my cat catnip and my neighbor's cat catnip. Disclaimer: All anime characters I use belong to their respective creators not me.)

"Now Yoruichi-san let's go for a day out!" Kisuke exclaimed waving his fan.

"Now why would I do that?" Yoruichi grumbled, lying in cat form and basking in the warmth on the sunny porch.

"You could go in cat form and I could carry you! I get to choose where, though." Kisuke replied smugly.

"I thought a lady chose that."

"Not when you're the one being carried. Not to forget~, your voice in cat form is a guy." Kisuke said and picked up the fairly light cat. Yoruichi let out a small, high-pitched meow.

"Fine Kisuke. But if you as much as try anything funny I will not hesitate to claw you to pieces." Yoruichi crawled up on Kisuke's shoulders. "Close your eyes Yoruichi-san." Yoruichi closed her eyes and took a small nap on Kisuke's head.

"Yoruichi-san you can wake up now." Kisuke prodded the sleeping figure on his hat with two fingers five minutes later. Said figure stretched and opened one eye and looked at the sign- _Karakura Pet Shop_. Yoruichi immediately jumped up and bristled. Kisuke ignored her and dragged the cat into the shop.

"Hello sir, that's a beautiful Bombay. Are you looking for kitty litter or cat food for her? If you need any help my name is Sakura." Sakura bowed politely and ran over to Syaoran.

"Look! Cat toys! It's a mouse. You really should get more exercise when you're in cat form. Not that you look bad." Kisuke muttered to the cat. "Are you suggesting that I am overweight Kisuke?" Yoruichi growled. "Did you not pay any attention to the last sentence: 'Not that you look bad.' You really are confusing you know. Now I look crazy talking to a cat." If cats could smirk that had got to be the best he ever saw.

"Kisuke this food is crap. What cat in their right mind would eat this?" Yoruichi told him as they passed the cat food. "Actually every cat except for you." Kisuke jokingly picked up a container and Yoruichi bat it out of his palm. It flew into his opposite palm and he laughed. Yoruichi kept trying to paw at the container. He set the can down and looked at the kitty litter.

"Yoruichi-san do you need kitty litter?" Kisuke prodded. Yoruichi clawed off a piece of his hat. "I'm perfectly capable of using the usual restroom. Now either stop playing around or I'm going to walk out the store." Yoruichi said in a low voice in Kisuke's ear. Kisuke sighed and put the kitty litter down.

"Anyway, look Yoruichi-san, it's catnip. I'll buy you a bag." Kisuke told the cat and waved said bag enthusiastically. Yoruichi jumped up and clawed at the bag. Her eyes widened and jumped off Kisuke's hat. She ran down Kisuke's arm and nibbled a piece of catnip on his palm. Yoruichi closed her eyes and reopened them. Her eyes were no longer calm but insane.


	2. Chapter 2

Kisuke took hold of Yoruichi, paid for a few containers of containers ultimately spending $25 on catnip. He smirked and ran back to the shop.

"Yoruichi-san~!" Kisuke sang and set Yoruichi down. "What? Oh ouch~!" Yoruichi put a kind paw on her head. "Ugh, catnip hangover." Yoruichi continued. "Aw is my Yoruneko-chan-san not feeling well?" Kisuke asked. "What's with the 'Yoruneko-chan-san' crap?" Yoruichi growled. Kisuke pouted. "Ah but I thought it was a cute nickname!"

"I don't particularly give a damn about what you call me right now, Kisuke. Just let me sleep." She set her head in between her paws and rolled onto her back exposing her belly. Kisuke sighed and looked at the sky and lay down with his hat on his face to protect himself from the sun. Yoruichi stretched and poked Kisuke's face with her paw. He stirred but was still asleep. Yoruichi shrugged and padded over him to the Karakura Pet Shop bag. She sniffed at the bag and stuck her paw in.

'Is this catnip?' Yoruichi thought. Yoruichi removed her paw from the bag and looked over at Kisuke who was still sleeping. She stuck her paw back in and pulled out some catnip. She repeated this until she got out all the catnip. Yoruichi held a small portion of the catnip in her paws and hid it in her secret hiding spot, under a loose plank on the back porch of the Urahara Shouten.

After, splitting up what she would eat and save, Yoruichi nibbled on the catnip. Nothing. She took a bite of the catnip. Still nothing. Yoruichi ate the rest of the catnip. Yoruichi smirked (I do believe cats smirk anyhow).

She ran around the house and bumped into a box, it dumped all it's contents of…A Kisuke hat collection? 'I thought Senbonzakura was the only one that kept spares.' Yoruichi thought and drew little figures on the hats with her claw. Yoruichi walked away from the hats and multiple shapes of cats flew into the air and landed in a neat pile.

Kisuke started snoring and his hat blew up and then landed back on his face from the massive inhaling and exhaling of air. Yoruichi pranced around singing the meow mix song. "Meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow."After running around and using shunpo and banging into many boxes, Yoruichi laid down next to Kisuke and hit his hat off of his head with her paws, she set it on her head and banged into a post effectively rendering her semi-unconscious. Kisuke stirred and rolled onto his stomach to avoid having the sun on his face. Yoruichi looked up at the sun but the hat blocked out her lane of vision and she meowed.

"Ugh, who painted the sun? Horrible taste." She bats the hat off of her face. "Oh that's it. Is this Kisuke's hat? Oh~~~ it is." Yoruichi slurred her words with a single drop of drool dripping from her black lips. Kisuke stirred in his sleep some more. "Who knew he rolled around so much?" Yoruichi said to no one in particular, slurring her words.

After an hour or so, the catnip started to wear off. With one last off-pitch recitation of the meow mix song, Yoruichi promptly passed out. Another 15 minutes later, Kisuke woke up and saw his hat ten feet away from him. After standing up and stretching, Kisuke walked over to the closet and pulled out a ladder. He climbed up the ladder and checked the small video camera hidden on the post holding up the roof.

Kisuke pulled out the small USB drive from the camera and stuck it in a small case and stuck it under his hat while he climbed down the ladder. After putting the ladder in its' respective place, he walked over to his computer and stuck the USB into the little hole on the side. Kisuke shut the door behind him, pulled out a pair of headphones and watched the video.

Kisuke was covering his mouth with his hand in an attempt to hold in his laughter. But all in all, it failed. Kisuke laughed loudly when he saw Yoruichi singing the meow mix song and then even louder when she ran into the pole. He quickly stopped and opened the door. Kisuke let out a loud sigh. Yoruichi was dead asleep. 'She looks kinda cute.' Kisuke thought and chuckled at the thought. He finished the video and stuck the USB into the inner folds of his haori.

Yoruichi woke up and stood up on all four paws before falling over as a wave of dizziness overcame her. "Kisuke!" Yoruichi meowed. Said person came to her side and picked her up. "Feeling a little dizzy, Yoruneko-chan-san~?" Kisuke sang.

Yoruichi nodded. Kisuke picked her up and walked upstairs to her bedroom and set her down on the bed. "Sweet dreams my little Yoruneko-chan-san~." Kisuke whispered before mentally slapping himself, since when was Yoruichi his?

Yoruichi smirked at the sentence and turned back to a human and closed the door before Kisuke could walk out. "Ah no, Yoruichi-san, what are you doing? You should be sleeping and I thought you were dizzy." Kisuke looked at her and then he looked down and quickly looked back up at her face. 'YORUICHI IS NAKED IN FRONT OF ME!' Kisuke was mentally slapping himself again at reminding himself of how much of a _pervert _he was.

"Come here, Kisuke." Yoruichi flicked one finger towards herself to gesture for Kisuke to come near before kissing him and pulling back. "I ah…" Yoruichi blushed and Kisuke smiled. 'How cute.' "I love you." Yoruichi whispered. "Really?" Kisuke asked stupidly and picked up Yoruichi before sitting down on the bed next to her. "Why would I lie? Of course I'm serious, baka!" Yoruichi smirked.

"I love you, Yoruneko-chan-san." Kisuke nuzzled her neck and looked at her face before kissing her. Yoruichi put her arms around Kisuke's neck and Kisuke put his arms around her waist. Kisuke broke the kiss for some very much-needed air. Yoruichi slipped on a form-fitting, short pale blue dress and white heels and set her hair in a clip. Kisuke wore a tuxedo and a black jacket with some black shoes and no hat…

"Would you go on a date with me, Yoruichi-san?" Kisuke asked her as soon as they were both changed. "That's why I'm dressed up like this. Also, I like the other nickname better, Kisu-chan." Yoruichi smirked. "Okay Yoruneko-chan-san." Kisuke smirked and closed the Urahara Shouten door with a resounding, "Click."


End file.
